That's all I'm giving him. If he fucks it up, I'm done.
I dropped the flowers off. He actually called, but he called before I could get home to answer the phone. And of course no one in my fucking house can answer a phone. I had to find out by looking at the caller id. I called him back. He wasn't there.
So, despite my asking him to call me, the weekend turned into another bout of unsuccessful, one-sided phone tag. Grrrr.
I finally got ahold of him around midnight on Sunday. His mom answered and told me how sweet what I did was, and how much Nick appreciated it. Then she let me talk to Nick. Nick said that he was watching a movie with a friend right now, so he couldn't talk, but I should IM him the next day to see what's going on. I said ok, and we said g'night.
He wasn't online the next day. And he wasn't home the next day. I called all afternoon and got nothing. I left multiple messages. I got ahold of his mom around 5:00, and she told me once again how sweet it was for me to bring the flowers, and how beautiful they are. But Nick wasn't there. He had headed out a little while ago, but he ought to be back later in the evening, and she would tell him to call me.
So, I waited.
And waited.
And waited.
Around 7:30, I got sick of waiting and called again. No answer. I got online and saw that he'd been online since 6:30. But he had an away message up. So, I knew he was home. So, I called again. No answer. Then I decided to call continuously until he picked up the phone.
Finally, he did.
He had been at the club all night the night before and stayed at a friend's house, so he didn't get back until late afternoon, and he had been in and out all day long. And he was about to start watching a movie with a friend, so he was busy now. But if I instant messaged him later this week, we could talk.
. . . .
NOT acceptable.
And I told him that. I asked him why he kept pushing this off, and that I have been trying to talk to him for a long, long time. He asked me what it was about. I told him that if he'd ever let me talk to him, I'd tell him. But it would not be over an IM screen, and it wouldn't be over the phone. He asked me if there was any time this week that I could make it over to his house. I told him to pick a day, and I would make sure I could get there. He paused, and so I just said that I could be there tomorrow at 10:00 pm. He said Tuesday would work better b/c then he could make sure no one would be coming over. I said ok, I'll be there at 10. And we hung up.
And I want to wring his neck. VERY badly. I am almost through with this shit. And I intend on telling him how through I am with his shit. This is his last chance. If he cancels, or "forgets" . . . I'm done.
And you know what really furiates me?
I'm not so sure if I can back that up. I'm not sure that I'll just be able to drop it. Even now I want to go buy him another, more expensive bouquet of flowers in the hopes that maybe I'll finally get it through his head that I like him and he'll stop being a dick. God, how fucking pathetic is that? I'm going to yell at him, definitely. But when I see him, how do I know that that anger isn't just going to melt away like it did last time? FUCK!!!
I really don't know what the hell I am going to do. But I am definitely going to need that double dosage of anti-depressants. God help me.
Eric 9/07/2003 11:58:00 PM
