Odd how the semester is almost over, yet I feel like I have more stuff to do than when I started. But yeah, several interesting developments today:
- In senior sem, I have to DEFEND legalizing marijuana in our "in-class debate", which is really rather irritating because of my strong stance AGAINST it. Also rather irritating is the fact that I am one of 3 people in the class who is actually opposed to legalizing marijuana . . . So, while I'm forced to defend this ludicrous stance, the people who are supposed to ATTACK, will just sit there telling me I'm right . . . I mean, yes, the point of this exercise is to force us to look at and consider other points of view. So in that respect, I'm looking at this as one hell of a challenge. But the thing is, I've already considered all the arguments for legalizing marijuana, and none of them stand up. They're all full of holes. Huge, gaping holes. I feel really awkward only being able to defend a viewpoint that is FULL of holes.
- My meeting with UNMC went really well (despite the fact that I was 10 minutes late because I couldn't find it). They seem incredibly eager to help me on this. I'm really surprised at their quickness to help. I thought it would be much more difficult. Hell, they even offered to foot most of the bill, in addition to allowing me to use their labs, materials, and equipment! And THEN they gave me info to contact people about working there over the summer on other research projects, and I WOULD GET PAID! It's all so overwhelming in a way. It's geat that they're so willing to help, but I feel so inadequate. I mean, this whole project mainly deals with microbiology and immunology. And while I find both really interesting, I haven't had a chance to take either course here at Dana. So the only things I know are the stuff I learned in intro bio. We'll see, I guess. I'm still really excited.
- My meeting with Sharon went really well. As far as my insecurities about the show, well, that's something that I've got to learn to deal with as an actor. Its not exactly an ego-stroking business (although it seems like my ego is really rather small, and has an incredibly fast metabolizm, so it needs to be fed frequently). But Sharon told me to talk to Doc about my insecurities. And, actually, it struck me that in any show I've ever been in with Brandon as a director, he's never . . . encouraged me, I guess. In Grease, Into the Woods, Seussical, and now Smokey Joe's Cafe, he rarely says anything to me at all. He'll occasionally tell me to do something differently, and incredibly rarely (like, maybe 2 times since I've met him) tells me I'm doing well. All the while he gives other people constant feedback. It very much seems like its only me that he doesn't give feedback to, and I wish I knew why . . . Hell, he's asking other people in the cast left and right to audition for his next show in Omaha (excpet me, of course). I don't know if I should approach him about it or what. I just find it very . . . odd . . . Anyway, after talking with my mom after my appointment, she confirmed that its my songs that probably cause the lack of reaction from people. They're pretty, and well performed, but not songs that jump out and grab you. She says that I was very under-used in the cast, and then remarked how I seem under-used in theater lately as a whole. I can't help but agree with her, as I feel the same way. I had so many major parts early in my college, career, and now I seem relegated to the background. She doesn't understand it any better than I do.
- I have a Shakespeare midterm on Thursday, which is freaking the hell out of me, as I have to actually finish Measure for Measure by then in addition to a HUGE overall intro to our text book. Just the idea of a mid-term after dealing with all this other stuff scares the hell out of me. I just want school to slow down.
- I have quite a bit to do to catch up in Evolution. I got an "A" on the first test (my first "A" in a bio course since 1st semester of my sophomore year; yeah, my grades have been that bad), but we already have a 2nd test on Monday . . . lovely. That, and I have to catch up in my little journal thing for the class.
- I went to Borders and proceeded to spend more money than I should have. I bought some dance mix CD, that is pretty decent so far, and then bought a short story compilation by Neil Gaiman, and then another anthology of stories depicting alternate histories. Both look fascinating. It was all I could do not to also buy Orson Scott Card's new Ender book or Christopher Rice's new novel. I miss reading.
- And, finally, I very much want to get to work on my one-man show again. I have this itch to direct again, and to be in the spotlight again, and, well, THIS is it. I can't wait to really delve into the script and start putting it together, but there are just soooooo many other things that I need to take care of first. Ugh, its frustrating. Along those lines, does anyone know where I can get a hold of a Gramophone, and a Phonograph? I need them both for the show. They are very important props, and I have no idea where to get either one.
