Taa-daaaaa!!!!! I'm posting once again! Isn't it amazing!? I sure think so.
Gawd, a shit ton of stuff has gone on. But I told myself that I'm done with emo, self-pitying, whining blog posts. Up until now, that's all I had on my mind, hence why I'm just now getting around to updating.
So, fuck, what's going on now? Ohhhhh, just everything. Let's tackle it a subject at a time:
Theater- I opened this season at BSB after being asked to play a male prostitute in Shining City, a contemporary Irish play. Yes, you read right, BSB produced a contemporary play. And it was a smashing hit. It was definitely one of the productions I'm most proud of. It's such a deep, emotional play, and I really enjoyed my character. For the first time, I really got underneath a character's skin and felt like I was becoming someone else. It's hard to describe, but it was a very great feeling. I could probably go on and on about it, and make an entire entry about it by itself, but I'll move on. I'll go into it later if anyone really wants to know.
Tomorrow (or later tonight, now that it's 2:30 am) begins the closing weekend to The Shadow of a Gunman, my 2nd show of the season. It's also my very first leading role. I mean, yes, I've played leads in high school and college, but in this show, I'm not a lead, I'm THE Lead. I never leave the stage, all the action revolves around my character and my character's decisions. The characters are all introduced through my point of view. I don't want to come off big-headed about it because to be totally honest, it all scares me shitless. I swear to God it does. It's an incredible amount of pressure to have a show on your shoulders and even after running for 2 weeks and a month of rehearsals, I still don't feel confident about my performance. There are tons of factors that go into it, but the end result is that I just don't feel like I'm doing my best, and, well, I said I wasn't going to be emo! So I'm not! It's really a great show to be a part of, and it's Eric's first play that's actually being performed! It's really a great show, and everyone in it is doing such an amazing job. On stage, I'm always striving to be as engaging as everyone around me. It's really great, and it's a shame that reviewers who cant't tell the difference between quality and their ass actually get paid to publish idiocy. Again, just ask if you'd like more details.
So, anyway, after this show, I've got a little bit part in the next show, Anna Christie. And thank GOD. I could really use the break. Smaller supporting parts are so much more relaxing! Plus, I don't have rehearsal till after next week. After Anna Christie, though, I've got a big ol' break till Hatful of Rain starts up in February. I get another juicy supporting role in that, and I get to play opposite Scott and Amy, and ohhhhhhhhh, Lord, I miss acting with Amy. She's really fun to work with. But, seriously, I need to get in shape. I'm supposed to be a bouncer for Hatful, and I'll be damned if I'm going to look like I do when I do it. I've got time, though. It's all good.
Work- Ohhhh, man, this has been the single greatest source of all emo-ness that has kept me from posting. I swear, doing temp work is so damn stressful when it ends. After my position at Syngenta ended at the beginning of August, I've been surviving off my savings. And, of course, I spent most of that on my San Francisco trip. Well, after August ended, I decided it was time to start looking for a job in earnest. After a couple weeks, I got a lead on a lab assistant position in a food-testing lab. I had the perfect qualifications, and it wasn't a temp job! It was the real thing! I went in for an interview. The week afterwards, they asked me back for a second interview! Things were really looking up.
And then I found out the week after that that I didn't get the job. No explanation or reason, just "we are unable to hire you". You know, like they really really tried to give me a job, but I didn't let them. I think that's what furstrated me so much: in the interviews, we talked about how I had every qualification 100%, and then they don't even tell me why they didn't hire me in the end. What was it? What was wrong with me?
Well, I think it was that I told them I want to go back to school in the next 5 years, and they want someone who is going to be with them long-term. I can understand that, I just wish they had told me. And really, I can't blame them for wanting a permanent employee.
But where does that leave me? If I can't get a good, steady job because I want to go back to school, then I'm doomed to either make do with temp work (and go out of my mind with stress when the position ends), or go back to fast food and suffer till I go off to school. Niether option sounds terribly thrilling, so then I'm presented with option #3: don't go back to school . . .
Just typing that makes me feel guilty. Like I'm quitting and I'm a failure. Yet if I stayed here, I could still do stuff at BSB, and I'd still grow as an actor . . .
But I really, truly believe that I need specific training if I'm ever going to make a living as an actor. I love BSB, but, shit, I dunno.
Well, right now, I have 3 job options to look at. 1) Aerotek called with a pair of offers. First one is that Syngenta is wanting to bring me back. However, they're still not terribly busy, so it'd be for part-time. This would last until spring. Aerotek didn't specify, but I'm assuming that since spring is Syngenta's busy season that the part-time position would resume as a full time position in spring. I don't know for certain, but that's what I think is most likely.
2) Aerotek is also looking to place someone in a Lab Assistant position for Transgenomics, a local genetic testing lab. It's 6 months temp to hire, and, well, basically, I'd do random stuff around the lab till they train me to be testing DNA. Testing fuckin' DNA!!!! This is the reason I became a Biology major in the first place! Genetics is fascinating, and this job looks even better than the food-testing one did. Aerotek sent them my resume this afternoon, and I'm waiting to hear from it.
Of course, they are looking for a more permanent employee. I'm not going to make the mistake of actually telling them I want to go back to school. But what would happen when I DID go back to school? What if I chose to stay there and NOT go back to school? I just don't know. It's a lot of stuff to think about. For right now, though, I'm going to see what happens with it.
Ka like the wind.
3) I just got a call about the FedEx delivery position I applied for. I'm going to see them in the morning (in 7 hours to be more precise). This is a part-time, seasonal position. I don't know how much it pays, or what it'll be like, but I guess that's what I'm going to find out tomorrow.
Basically, if the genetics lab position falls through, I definitely will be going back to Syngetna. I'm thinking that the part time positions at Syngenta and FedEx ought to support me nicely till . . . well, till something happens. Yay for continuing to tread water~!
But at least I'm no longer drowning like I was for the past 2 months . . .
Money- Student loans are $180 a month, and were supposed to be paid starting in August. Car payment is a month behind, and my car insurance was cancelled. I've had to break into my credit card to make car payments as it is. Hopefully, though, I'll be starting work somewhere the week after next at the latest, so I think I'll be ok.
Video Games- Slowly, but surely my Puppetmaster is climbing the levels. I've now completed all 3 final missions in all 3 FFXI expansions. And next month, a new expansion comes out. I'm very excited to tackle new adventures with my FFXI buddies.
The re-release of Final Fantasy Tactics was last week. I've been jonesing to play that game since July. I've been obsessing about playing it ever since September. A few days ago, I was going nuts not being able to play it. And why couldn't I play it? Because I have no job, hence no money, hence can't afford to buy the PSP system to play the game on. I tried getting Kelly to buy it, because he's more obsessed about the game than I am, but in my excitement I forgot to take into account that he's first-and-foremost, a stingy bastard.
I even turned to Eric and half-seriously begged him to buy it. Well, despite his FF-fandom, he's not a fan of strategy games, and he has enough bills to pay. I got him to agree to get a used PSP, but when we went to the store to look at them, Gamestop wanted just as much for a used, out-dated PSP than new out-dated PSPs went for last month (PSP used to be $130 new, but then they released a re-designed version with extra features for $170. Now, all you can get is the new design for $170). Well, I figured it'd be a waste of money, so I told him that we should just wait to get the newly designed PSP.
Anyway, Eric suggested that I finish all my current games instead of being obsessive over a new game. After a few days of depressed moping, I saw the light, and I've been doing just that.
I finished Dragon Quest VIII a few days ago. Very good game, even though it's the biggest offender of the RPG stereotype where you run 50 errands to accomplish one task. Still, it had a great sense of humor, and had a very sweet ending.
After that, I picked Xenosaga II back up. I hadn't played it for 2 years, so not only was I totally clueless as to what was going on in the story (the Xenosaga series has, hands down, the most complicated plot of anyTHING -any book, movie, game, etc.- that I've ever read), but I was also totally clueless about the battle system. Basically, Xenosaga II's battles are a complicated system of charging up attacks, earning extra turns, striking enemies' weak points, then finding JUST the right time to use all the characters' extra attacks and turns in a row, making a combo to damage the enemy. Failing to go to all that trouble usually results in barely being able to scratch the enemy at all. It's a heavily tactical battle system, and while it definitely creates a challenge, it's VERY difficult to get back into after not having played it for 2 years. In the end, I wrapped up the game, and was reminded about why it's such an amazing game series in the first place.
Immediately afterward, I began itching to play Xenosaga III. Luckily, Eric had gotten it for me for Christmas last year, and OH MY GOD, why haven I not been playing this game!? The battle system has been simplified so that while it's still a challenge, it's not incredilby stressful. The story is as amazing as ever, and the 3rd game even includes an extensive in-game library that catches you up to speed on everything that happened in the first two games (and thank god, because I really had no idea what I was watching when I beat Xenosaga II). All in all, if fucking rocks.
I still have a few PC games I need to finish, but I really need a new graphics card to be able to play them and not constantly curse my frame-rate. Alas, until I have a job, I can't afford a new video card.
And Eric and I are almost done with Final Fantasy V. The translation has been laughably bad (we are constantly laughing and going 'what the hell?' whenever we play), but it's been fun. The Job System is addictive as hell (hence the FFT obsession), and it's even more fun because it's something we can play together. We're going to tackle Final Fantasy IV when we're done. If only you could set all RPGs up to Co-op mode . . .
And, I've also been introducing Eric to the Silent Hill series. I'm really not sure how he's liking it, though. As it's only one player, and he hates the control scheme, I play while he watches. And since we play at night (when else CAN you play horror games), he's falling alseep in the middle of it half the time. You know, it's a real shame he can't stand to play anything other than a standard RPG, because he's missing out on a TON of really great stories. I know he'd love them, it's getting him to experience them that's the problem. Anyway, we're on Silent Hill 3. Or at least we were about 2 weeks ago. I think he's forgot about it since then . . .
Books- I've finished 6 of the 7 Dark Tower books. It's another one of those situations where I want to know what happens, but I don't want it to be over. Thus, I'm torn between going on to the 7th and final book, or waiting. Things are really building up, and there's all sorts of foreshadowing that characters are going to start dieing, and it's scaring the crap out of me. I don't want any of them to die! I like them!
Well, lately, I've been interjecting other Stephen King books in between each Dark Tower book. Actually, most of his novels are related to the Dark Tower series in some way, so I've been interjecting the books that tie in the most closely. It's actually a really cool and satisfying experience. I really recommend it to anyone who picks up the series
Also, the next Nightwatch book needs to come out. They got 2 and 3 translated and published within a few months, but #4 sure is taking a while.
And, finally, earlier this month Robert Jordan, author of the Wheel of Time series passed away. Honestly, my first thought was, "oh shit, I'll never know how the series ends". And then I felt that was a really selfish thing to think and felt this awkward combination of guilt and sadness. Seriously, though, it's really tragic that he died before completing the final volume to this series. It's such an enormous and fantastic world he's created with these novels. Not only can he not finish the story, but he can't expand upon it. He can't explore other aspects of this incredibly rich and complex world he's created. It really is tragic. According to Kelly, he had the end of the story plotted out and out-lined, and his wife, who was his editor through-out the series, is more than able to finish the book for him. So, the end of the story is coming, but it's still sad that he won't be around to witness it. To see how it affects his fans. To be thanked by them. I really can't get the word "tragedy" out of my head. If there's any way you can read this, R J, thank you for such an amazing story. I truly mean it.
Movies- 30 Days of Night comes out later today. WOO HOOO!!!!! Ever since I first saw the preview, I've been looking forward to this movie. Of course, I'm a vampire nut, but this just looks so damn COOL.
Oh, and I find it incredibly irritating that I have to wait until the 3rd weekend in October before I can see a horror movie in theaters. Seriously, what the fuck? This is OCTOBER, hollywood! You know, that month with Halloween! Where the hell are all the horror movies? Oh yeah, that's right, they all come out ON Halloween. Christ, you people are ridiculous. Instead of making money off of horror movies for the entire month, you are going to be fighting 5 other horror movies for your opening weekend, then, when Halloween is over, people are going to be sick of horror, and want to move on to different entertainment. From a common sense AND a financial standpoint, you are morons.
Ohhhh, and with that, I think I'm gonna at least try and get some sleep. I need to be up in 5 hours to get ready for my Interview with FedEx. Toodle-ooo for now!
Eric 10/19/2007 02:08:00 AM
